Labels as Signposts

 Conversation with my son age 14

Me:  Autism means different brain wiring.  Seeing things differently can mean challenges in particular areas.

Son:  Saying I have asd is no use.  It doesn't give any information.  It doesn't say how smart I am.

Me:  You're right.  So we could say you're very smart and you have some challenges.

Son: I'm smart, and I have anxiety.

Me:  You're smart and you have anxiety and demand avoidance.

Son:  Ah what's the demand avoidance mean really?

Me:  Well you know the way if I ask you to do something it actually makes it harder for you to do it.

Son:  Yea, I'm smart and I have anxiety and I don't conform.

Me:  Ok, that's clear.

Son:  Now you're talking sense.

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